worry vs. hope

i consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory about to be revealed to us. for the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the children of God; for the creation was subjected to futility, not of its own will but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to decay and will obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. we know that the whole creation has been groaning in labour pains until now; and not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly while we wait for adoption, the redemption of our bodies. for in hope we were saved. now hope that is seen is not hope. for who hopes for what is seen? but if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. -- romans 8:18-25

i am a worrier. you can ask jamie, who can attest to the fact that sometimes i'm a little insane. i get this pretty honest from my mother, who refused to go to the state fair after 9/11 because she believed north carolina was next on osama bin laden's hit list. until i was 22, i wouldn't fly on an airplane for fear of dying in a plane crash. i don't worry about everything, but it's the big, existential things that strike at my core -- questions about life and death and God. and i'm pretty sure that these are the questions that everyone has, whether they admit to them or not. i also believe they're at the root of all worrying. rest assured, my life and my being rest firmly on jesus christ -- his life, death, and resurrection. i believe that jesus is the son of God, the one who came to redeem this world from sin and despair. and i believe that those who follow him have great hope for a better life -- a life after death where sin is no more. but i won't pretend i don't have questions about how that all works, nor will i deny that i have questioned whether it's all true.

i'm pretty sure that "worry" was one of the first by-products of what happened in the garden of eden. worrying became wired into human beings as soon as sin entered the world. it became a natural response to the decaying world of despair that we have come to know east of eden. last night, i went to my bible to look up a passage in romans that we translated in greek. i was then reminded of the above verses, which became some of my favorite words of the apostle paul after i wrote a paper in new testament about this passage. when i worry, i feel like it's my body "groaning" -- knowing that i have been made for something greater, yet still struggling to live with hope in this world. and yet paul reminds us that we have something to look forward to -- glory is about to be revealed. we will be redeemed, taken out of this despair, rescued -- we will be adopted.

sometimes, it's easy to get caught up in this world. it's all we, as humans, have ever known. and there is a lot here that is quite beautiful -- family, friends, the ocean, a flower, laughter, music. i think God uses the beauty of these things to point towards what is to come. paul is right when he says that hope that is seen cannot be hope. how can i hope for something that i have already seen, something that has already come to be? a child hopes for the joy of christmas day because he knows of the greatness of it, but he has not yet experienced it. but when it finally comes, it is better than he ever could have imagined. his hope has been realized, and he no longer has to "hope" anymore. what is to come for us is something that we have not yet known, but paul assures us that whatever we experience in this world -- the sufferings, but even those things that are beautiful -- is not even worth comparing to what is to come.

i want to live with purpose and intention in this world, always doing what i can to ease the groaning of creation. let me be clear: i don't agree with theologies that excuse christians from doing justice in this world just because there is hope for another one. but i pray not to get so caught up in this world that i dread leaving it. i want to become better at believing that when we are finally set free from bondage to decay and sin, it will be more glorious than anything we have ever known. and so i cling to these words of paul as i try to respond to this world always with hope rather than worry, even as i struggle (sometimes) to hope for something which i have not yet seen.